CHER: NOT COM.MERCIAL (2000)
1)
Still; 2) Sisters Of Mercy; 3) Runnin'; 4) Born With The Hunger; 5) (The Fall)
Kurt's Blues; 6) With Or Without You; 7) Fit To Fly; 8) Disaster Cake; 9) Our
Lady Of San Francisco; 10) Classified 1A.
In a perfect world... well, in a truly perfect
world, Cher would have been the US ambassador to Armenia. But in a world just
several notches below perfection, Believe
would have not existed, and Not
Com.mercial would be commercial all the way through — if only as a sign of
respect for a modestly talented artist to go out there and actually do something. As the story goes, the
majority of the songs on this album were written by Cher herself (still with a
little help from the corporate people, of course) after she attended a 1994
songwriters' conference (I had no idea they held these, but then again, why
not? I bet they hold Mick Jagger impersonator conferences, too!), and the bulk
of the album was recorded the same year in France. She then offered the album
to Warner Brothers, who turned it down, seeing it as «uncommercial», and had to
shelve it for an indefinite period of time. However, once Believe truly hit its stride and brought her all the money she
could ever need, she no longer needed Warners' approval — and simply released
the album on her own, advertising it through her website.
In a way, this was a smarter decision: Believe, her most successful, yet also
most plastic and artificial release in ages, followed by an undeniably
personal and «artistic» album that purports to show the world the real Cher,
regardless of whether it garners any sales or not — there was no serious
promotion whatsoever, not even any singles culled from the sessions, and she
never gave any live performances of these songs. Eventually, the album became
the same kind of retrospective curiosity as 1980's Black Rose (Cher as a Serious Artist) and has even managed to gain
a bit of a cult following; for some old-time fans, it might have even looked
like a credible redemption after the intolerable crassness of Believe.
Unfortunately, the only way to make Not Com.mercial look decent is in the
overall context of Cher's career curve; on its own, the record is just
«listenable stuff» at its best, and «banal mediocrity» at its worst. If Cher
really had what it takes to be an intriguing singer-songwriter, we would all be
seeing that as early as 1965, and if you need to take lessons in songwriting in
order to break out your dormant genius, a priori chances are that the genius
will turn out to be a mechanical hack. Melodically, the songs are okay — a mix
of generic folk rock and adult contemporary, with a bit of swamp blues thrown
in for good measure; not tremendously different, by the way, from the style
that would be dominant on It's A Man's
World — but there's very little to grab and hold one's attention, unless it
happens to be some element that is consciously or subconsciously lifted from
some classic, e. g. the moody snowy organ introduction to ʽWith Or Without Youʼ
which, naturally, evokes memories of ʽA Whiter Shade Of Paleʼ.
Message-wise, the songs are split between
(predictably) stories of complex relationships and (less predictably) «social
value» rants that go all the way from corny embarrassments (ʽOur Lady Of San
Franciscoʼ, where she complains about a social system that turns people,
herself included, away from helping poor old ladies in the streets — oh, my!)
to not-half-bad statements on religious hypocrisy (ʽSisters Of Mercyʼ, with a
tasteful steel guitar and harp arrangement and a particularly wicked-sounding
vocal part that shows she really has a bone to pick with somebody on that
issue; not a wise decision to give it the same title as that of a far superior
Leonard Cohen song, though). Arguably the
weirdest number on the whole record is ʽ(The Fall) Kurt's Bluesʼ: for some
reason, Cher decided to write and record a tribute to Cobain, stating that she
"understands his pain" and that "we're a heartless, Godless
culture / we'd walk nowhere in your shoes". Now just imagine if she'd
appeared onstage, all dressed up in the usual chic, at the MTV Awards or some
ceremony like that, and delivered this
tune instead of ʽBelieveʼ! She even thinks up (or lets her co-writers think up,
I dunno) a proverbial killer two-liner for the end: "Our country kills its
heroes / We just raise them for the fall". Excuse me for a moment while I
break out those hankies, this is just too much for my nervous system to bear.
So, in the end, if you look at this from an
optimistic angle, Not Com.mercial is
an interesting, image-defying, sincere-sounding record, professionally and
rather tastefully recorded by Cher with members of David Letterman's band, and delightfully
shattering stereotypes. But if you choose the other angle, then it's a somewhat slick, manipulative, and
ultimately bland and generic set of traditionally written roots-pop songs with
unwarranted pretense at «depth» and «authenticity», sung by a veteran Vegas
glitz-star who has been happy enough to corrupt public taste with cheap,
brainless entertainment for several decades, and now goes on a rant about the injustices and the imperfections of
that same society as if she had never had anything to do with them. So does she
ever sit back and wonder, «Why the hell did those critics kick the crap out of my Not Com.mercial album? I know it didn't sell because it was not
commercial, but how come it got all those mixed-to-negative reviews?..» And if
she ever does, does she have enough intelligence (or bravery) to give herself
the right answer?
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